So, we moved to Arlington to a smmmaaallll church with a youth group of about, oh, FOUR kids. lol Way different. I felt called there and looked forward to seeing what God was already doing and what He wanted to do with this group of kids. There were 2 girls who came consistantly at this time, and so I began to pray about "how to disciple and mentor them." Except, I still didn't know those terms...All I kept thinking was, "There's no Erica here." What was I going to do? These kids acted (hope I don't offend anyone, love you!! lol) like they knew it all and that we had little to offer them (at the time.) And I kept thinking, "There's no Erica here. Neither of these girls are like Erica." Although I did of course miss Erica, I also missed investing and mentoring someone. Of pouring into a student and having them challenge me too. Of feeling like I'm making more of an impact than just teaching a lesson twice a week. One of the girls was a senior and was very busy, so although we spent time together...she just wasn't "my Erica." Other girls had started attending, and I prayed about who I should start investing in...who seemed interested in having me know them better and really challenging them? I kept thinking about Jenni, but she also was so busy! And, for awhile, seemed so content with her faith being the easy answers she offered in Sunday School...I thought I probably annoyed her more than helped her!!! And she wasn't "my Erica."
But, I began to notice things...Like, she had a child-like faith; she was in awe of God and excited about what He was doing in her life and in the lives of others. She had friends that were Christians AND non-Christians. Her self-worth and identity were based on Christ and not on boys or other people/things. She also was already using her talents and gifts to honor God; she was in the praise band. We began to eat lunch together once a week (with 2 other ladies) and we also "hung out' and liked being around each other. Later, we would get together, just she and I at least once a week and go deeper. We'd ask each other hard questions and expect the other to be honest and open up. She became one of my BEST friends. (Who is now also my sister!!) We challenged each other and when she graduated and left for Tech, I literally felt empty and a little despair. I had other adult friends then, but there is something VERY special and irreplaceable about someone you have discipled and poured yourself into. It's like they took a little bit of you with them when you leave each other.
Erica made me a different girl, a different and better Christian and youth minister.
Jenni made me a different girl, a different and better Christian and youth minister.
Jenni made me a different girl, a different and better Christian and youth minister.
I'm looking for "my Erica." I'm looking for "my Jenni." Not to replace them, as if you could do such a thing! I am looking for that girl who has a child-like faith. Whose identity and self-worth aren't based on boys or other things/people. Who care about other students in different walks of their faith and who want to use their talents to honor God. Who think that I have something to offer them, and who will challenge me back.
There are several girls that I am discipling, but I need to find my Erica/Jenni girl. Please pray for me; that God will make it clear who this girl is and that I will do whatever's necessary to start and build that relationship.
1 comment:
Well, I want my Mary...the real one, haha! I love you!
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